Kristin Marthaler
As a senior, I should be planning my May graduation, telling my new employer when I can start and signing that lease on the new apartment I just rented. But I’m not, I still have one more semester to go. That’s not my problem. My problem is I’m terrified.
Where do I go from here?
SDSU has given me so many great experiences that I can take with me, into the “real world.” But when and where does the real world start? Some say it starts here in college. Everything that we as students have to go through is pretty much what happens in the “real world.” Is it possible to be terrified of the real world? My friends in my major already have jobs in their future. I have nothing, I’m working on getting my internship under my belt. They are planning where to spend the next five years of their lives, while I contemplate how to get to Sioux Falls and back each day with an unpaid internship.
I am not envious of them at all. That is going to be me in one more semester. I lay awake at night hoping I can find a job one day or that I will be able to pay the rent. Don’t even mention trying to get married. That is a whole other avenue I’m terrified to go down. Expecting someone to deal with me the rest of their life ? Poor them!
I’m glad I came to SDSU. I know I don’t have another school to compare it to, but think of all the experiences you get here. There’s classes ranging from Native American Studies to Arabic to chemistry. More majors are being added to the curriculum every day. Being the editor-in-chief of the Collegian has also helped tremendously. It’s taught me patience, standing by your word, editing (though some beg to differ) and, last but not least, a “real world” frame of mind. By all calculations, I should be ready. Shouldn’t I?
Is every student terrified of starting their life? When do you know you are ready? Is there some sign? “Hey, you made it, Kristin.” Or a call from a professor? “Hey Kristin, hear you made it.”
I know things will work out fine. With a four-year degree under me, I’m pretty much guaranteed not to wind up under a bridge, living in some box. But what if? Life is so full of what ifs I get sick of asking them myself. But what if?
What if I didn’t work as the editor-in-chief? What if I studied abroad? What if I actually tried my freshman year and started off with a higher GPA?
What if, I just follow my heart?
Related posts:
Follow Us!